Family Therapy in Coral Springs
Do you, as an older teen or young adult, find yourself dealing with a communication gap between you and your family members?
Haven Family Therapy can help bridge that gap.
“They just don’t get it…”
You’ve grown up with your family, you love each other, and yet, they don’t get it. The way you and your family all talk to each other, it feels like you’re talking to walls. Or even yelling at walls, sometimes.
If you’ve moved away from home, for college or to start your own, this communication failure can get even bigger. You’re just not on the same page with your family, and it hurts! You want to try to fix this, but your parents or siblings, they’re so hard to reach right now.
Know this: no relationship is beyond repair. Family therapy can help your family talk to each other, not past each other. Regardless of the challenges you face, in family therapy, we can work to rebuild meaningful, healthy relationships.
There is Hope For Your Family
It can be hard to trust that, say, your mother, who has often dismissed what you had to say, will change. It can be hard to trust that your sibling, who you never felt close to, will suddenly open up. It can be hard to trust that your in-laws will stop undermining you and start treating you like a human being.
Lack of trust can bring about all sorts of communication breakdowns. A place to build trust in each other is a key benefit of family therapy.
As a family therapist, I specialize in bringing teens, adults, and even extended family members together, to focus on everyone’s strengths as a way to build trust as a family. There is hope, and family therapy can show you the way back to harmony.
Is Family Therapy Right For Us?
If you’re already asking yourself this question, the answer is probably “yes”. Family dynamics can be complicated! Getting counseling together, as a family, can strengthen your bonds and lead you all in a healthier direction. If your family is still willing to address the problems you’re experiencing, now is the time.
Family trauma
Divorce
Ineffective communication
Substance abuse from a family member
Behavioral issues from a family member
Mood swings in the family unit
Some signs that family counseling may be beneficial for your family situation include the following:
Marrying into a family
Shifting understanding of gender identity and sexuality
Lack of acceptance of new family roles
Adding a child to the family through birth or adoption
So, What Happens in a Family Therapy Session, Anyway?
Discovering
Family Therapy sessions start out by finding issues that have shown up between family members. I will ask questions to help uncover these issues, as well as to get to know each family member and their role in the family better.
Planning
I’ll ask you to set goals for our sessions. What do you want your family relationships to look like? What repairs can we focus on, what skills do each of you need to work on, and where do your goals align, or diverge, from each other?
Discussing
I want to know your family’s strengths as well as its struggles. I’ll ask solution-focused questions throughout the sessions we have together, to track how your family progresses together, and so each family member can hear the thoughts of the others on how well your family functions. You’ll get to know each other better in this space, helping you connect and communicate.
Resolving
As you work to meet your shared goals, you’ll practice skills to better hear and be heard. You’ll be encouraged to meet each other with non-judgement, and employ respectful active listening and positive communication as you work through issues. At the end of each session, we will create a summary of the session and discuss any next steps if needed.
How will I know family therapy is working?
Just like in any type of counseling, family therapy is a process and it takes time, effort, and commitment to see results.
Here are several signs that progress is being made with family counseling:
Healthier communication between family members
Less resentment toward family members
More openness and honesty about each other’s feelings
More expression of love and gratitude
Better understanding of each family member’s needs
Real respect toward boundaries
Family Therapy Can Help You Find Your Voice
You may not be used to voicing your concerns and hurt with your family. Teens can often be withdrawn and push family away as a way to feel safe, so as you are just emerging into your adult years, it can take practice to really get through to your family.
The guidance I can offer as a family therapist can give you a “haven” to share your thoughts and feelings. You can express yourself fully, knowing your family is all there to hear each other, and to work together. I want to help you, and every other family member, find your voice.
Skills you will work on in family therapy:
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focusing on who is speaking and what they have to say, hearing them instead of thinking about what you might say next.
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giving people space to be themselves, treating them with dignity.
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speaking with “I” statements, calmly stating the facts of the matter without laying blame or adding criticism.
Family therapy can help you find the way forward, together.
In family therapy, I want you to all feel like you’re on the same team. Instead of the blame game, we move into a safe and supportive space to share your feelings and concerns, openly and honestly.
It might sound hard to believe, but together, you and your family can work through family conflict, reinforce boundaries, and address whatever comes up in a family therapy session. The goal is to look at the needs of each individual family member, to look at the needs of the family as a whole, and to find a solution that works for everyone.
Common Questions about Family Therapy
It can be nerve wracking to consider sitting your family down together, or sitting one-on-one with a family member you have a difficult relationship with.
Many families I work with have similar worries, and it’s helpful to prepare ahead of time. Here are some common questions I get about family therapy:
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When you’ve tried what you can to work things out between your family member(s) and yourself, when you’ve found that nothing is really working and things aren’t getting better, that’s the time to look for a family therapist. Before the family relationship is completely severed, when those in the family still want to work together, that is the best time.
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Sometimes it is best to include an entire family unit in a family therapy process. It can be helpful to see where different family members stand in the family dynamic, and to hear everyone out in turn.
That said, sometimes you simply need to work on communication, say with your mother, or a sibling, or your mother-in-law. Working with a smaller, more focused group in family therapy can still bring you together in a safe space for healing and repairing the relationship.
That said, it can be helpful to bring more family members in, to get a more complete picture of how the family unit works as a whole. We can work together to find the best balance of family therapy group size.
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I get it. Some people are very resistant to the idea of counseling; you might have a hard time getting your parents, siblings, in-laws, or others to go with you to family therapy.
It is best if you can get as many of the family members involved in the situation you’re looking to address to attend, but it is definitely the case that we can still create healing if some family members won’t participate. It may take longer, but it is possible.
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Trust between family members can be built, through open and honest communication that goes both ways, so everyone is heard. You’ll have to reach out, but your family will have to reach back, in a family therapy environment; everyone puts in the work, and a family therapist makes sure things are balanced in a session.
The goal of family therapy is to heal old wounds through hearing each other, without criticism or blame. Through that healing, a better family dynamic can be built on a foundation of respect and trust.
Ready to Get Started?
When you’re ready to work together as family members, meeting each other face-to-face, and listening to each other, I am here to help facilitate better family connection. Family Therapy through Haven Family Services is a space to find common ground, mutual, respect, and a space heal and build a closer family.